While sitting here thinking about what to write this month, the phone rang (it always does when you're about to start something!). On the line was a dear friend who had called to tell me her 20-year marriage had just come to an end. She had 2 weeks to move out but wasn't in a state to pack.
Her primary feeling was relief (it had not been great for a while). Then there was sadness. Then there was fear. Fear of the future, of becoming a bag lady (although she did assure me it was going to be a beautiful and very expensive bag), of being alone and of managing the day-to-day. It was the full catastrophe.
Her power, her aliveness and her spirit got me thinking about the power of intention and this quote from George Bernard Shaw:
This is the true joy in life, being used for a purpose recognised by yourself as a mighty one. Being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live, it is my privilege to do for it what I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no brief candle to me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.
Intention is an honoured, central part of mindfulness practice. The first of the most famous recitations in Buddhist texts begins" "Mind is the forerunner of all things. With our mind or our heart, we determine what will happen for us." The spirit that we bring to the world determines what returns to us.
In meditation, it is critical to understand intention.
When you start to sit in meditation you can set an intention. Once you set an intention, it begins to take power.
It could be an intention like "I intend to sit every day for the next week, or the next month. Even if it's only five minutes.” And the first time you may be sitting there, and your body may get restless, and you think of all the things you need to do. And you notice it, mindfully, and then let it pass. And then that wave might come again– "Oh, I've got to do these things..." or "My body is too achy to sit". And then it will pass. This simple act of setting an intention inwardly may give a greater power to your meditation.
A lovely way to understand intention is by using the idea of planting seeds. If you plant an acorn, you get an oak tree. You don't get an aspen or an avocado. If you plant seeds of anger, greed and fear, that will create a certain karma, or a certain atmosphere. If the seeds of care, or the best intentions of respect and so forth are planted, that's what will grow.
Another powerful way to work with intention is by taking a mindful pause. Perhaps you're in conflict with someone, or there's something difficult happening, or you received a text, or an email, and you're about to respond. You're triggered.
The Mindful Pause would go something like this:
You take a breath. You ask a simple question-- "What's my highest goal?" or "What's my best response?" or "What matters to me in this response?". Then, when you reread that text, you might notice defensive tendencies- to protest and protect. And so you take that pause. As you open up to yourself, you begin to learn.
When I was first asked in meditation training what my intention was, my mind took a hike. I don’t know. It sounded too lofty. As I have written in previous newsletters, goal setting and planning are not my strong suite. The concept of 'intention' slotted right in there. But as I calmed myself I found, as D. H. Lawrence eloquently put it, “it's not what the self wants, it's what the deepest self wants, and it takes some diving.”
So whether you’re the being that really reaches out, and connects with and serves others, or the one that’s going into retreat or off to hike in Bhutan or whatever, ask yourself... what is your deepest yearning?
What seeds are you planting now?
With love and peace,
Rita